Starship Kirk

Snatches of conversation overheard in the cafeteria of the U.S.S. Kirk.

Lieutenant Baptist: “What I’ve got here is a list of extra regulations I think Starfleet wants added to the book.”

Ensign Pentecostal:  “Don’t you see?  You’re misinterpreting those orders from the Grand Admiral because you won’t let his spirit speak to your heart!  In fact, if you let him speak through you, you don’t even need the orders.”

Lieutenant Conservative Lutheran:  “All I’m saying is:  why should I man my post?  Don’t we pay the Captain to do that?”

Lieutenant Commander Elca:  “I built a shrine to my new uniform.  We can go there and take part in my unique socio-cultural tradition of thinking about how if Starfleet were real, they would want us to shamelessly seek promotion in the name of ruling the stupid masses for their own good.”

Engineer Evangelical Calvinist:  “The ship’s designer knows everything about this ship.  He planned it out, right from the beginning.  He knew it would be in fights.  So why bother repairing the battle-damage?  It was part of his plan from the beginning.”

Okay.  Ran out of churches I’ve been in and remember.  For what it’s worth, not all crewmen are like that.


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